The Love & Fear of Traveling
Dear Dad,
Finally being home for Christmas break meant it was time to sit down and ponder the things I've been wanting to tell you about 2024 as a whole. Instead of getting worked up by my own words and the title of this letter almost being Distressing, I decided I wanted to tell you about my spontaneous yet much needed trip to San Diego this past weekend.
As December crept up on myself and my college friends directly after Thanksgiving break, my procrastination towards studying for finals took even more of a turn for me after finding out that I'd been invited to a leadership conference on the West Coast. Even though I had to reschedule 5 finals into 2 days, it was a great opportunity to network and grow in my professionalism while meeting people from across the country.
Leading up to the trip I was ready to leave for so many reasons, more generally just because I knew being done with school was so close yet so far. This wish to be home took such a hold of me to the point that waking up at 3am for my first layover was the last thing I wanted to do. I just wanted to be home to shut off my brain, which was long overdue from daily social interaction and extracurricular exhaustion.
But as I landed in Denver and began to see a part of the world I so long have yearned for, the independence and success that I felt from traveling alone made the commitment finally click in my head. I couldn't believe I was almost in California!
This new feeling of excitement led me to the window seat of a small Southwest Airlines plane that took me coast to coast all weekend. As I watched the unfamiliar landscape of ice-capped mountains and miles of canyons, I was amazed but even more scared. I felt this not only in contemplation that the West Coast wouldn't be everything I thought it would be, but that it just wouldn't be home.
Landing in San Diego gave me just that feeling---like I was there once and in turn, didn't need to go back. Regardless, the experience of staying in such a beautiful place for 3 short days was something I would never want to forget. But seeing how desolate this side of the country was outside of the hustle and bustle of each city just didn't make sense to me. In other words, the deserts of the west that seemed so close to somewhere like an Diego couldn't have been any more different, or most importantly to me, different from my quaint home in Pennsylvania :D
I can't remember what I may have been listening to at 13 years old when you last saw me dad...but it was probably really bad rap the brothers showed me that I was too young to listen to. With redemption, here are some artists that I lived off during 15 hours on a plane:
ERNEST (obviously)
Morgan Wallen (again...obviously)
Lainey Wilson
Adele
Sam Smith
Bruno Mars
Mr. Worldwide!!!!!
Charlie Puth
SZA
Noah Kahan
Megan Moroney
Being so far from home for just a short amount of time showed me how trading comfort and peace for independence and a strong head is so real. For now, all I want is to be where my feet are at this present moment: in my living room with Christmas lights all around me and snow outside that's been falling all day. To another break of returning back to my safe space and going back to my roots, happy holidays Dad.
Your daughter,
Lauren M Tauber
P.S. Maybe next time I write you'll receive more authentic feelings of mine while I'm at school...get ready to hear the stress!
